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Where the hell is my life going?
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Old 07 Mar 2010, 05:11   #1 (permalink)
Ethereal
 
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Default Where the hell is my life going?

First things first - I don't expect anyone to reply to reply to this or even read it. I just need to vent somewhere and get some thoughts down.

What the hell am I doing? I'm on a course that has no real future in it with the the exception of teaching (yay...) or going into even more education. No one needs a frigging artist and I've already been told that I am not going to make it as an actual public artist and get work into galleries and such. I certainly don't have the skill nor the patience to go and work in the design department for GW, which would be my dream job.

Thats what it is all going to come down to - what am I going to do when I leave uni? I can't do anything with the degree I get - it is simply there to prove that I've been successfully processed through university. I could get an office job, but I did that for 2 weeks and almost lost my mind. It is the most mind numbing days I have ever had in my pathetic excuse for a life. Nothing challenging, nothing there to make the day interesting. Punch in at 9, out at 5. Fun. Get home, eat, slob in front of the TV cause I don't have enough time to do anything else and then go to bed to wake up and do the exact same. Repeat for the next 40 years and retire to go and do some gardening with whatever poor girl I've had to settle with.

And thats another thing - Girls/ women. Whatever. It's been years since I've had a girlfriend. The problem? I don't ****ing know!! Lets start at the top. The dream girls are always either taken or are just simply not interested. Not even worth the time. The championship (ie - not premier legue) girls, such as Ellen, are usually being hounded by so many guys that I don't stand a chance. The few times I do is just pure luck. The Girls that I consider at my level I can't help but notice that they all have boyfriends, or they are simply just too brain dead and empty minded that I just can't stand being with them. And after uni? When my free time is strangled by the same tie I wear to the office - when am I going to meet girls? My biggest fear is that I am going to die alone. I don't want riches, fame and glory or any of that. All that I want is a loving wife and a good home. Thats it. It's been so long since I've been in the flirting game that I don't have any confidence in what I do or say. That wont be a good combination in years to come - no real free time to try my luck every week, and when the opportunity does arise I **** it up. I'm not good looking and I stumble and trip over my own words when talking to my closest friends now, what is it going to be like in a few years.

I can't help but notice that my time is slipping away. Nothing is challenging, I'm just coasting along in life simply "getting by". I don't have any drive to do anything productive.

Anyways - thanks for reading.
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Old 07 Mar 2010, 11:34   #2 (permalink)
Zen
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Default Re: Where the hell is my life going?

If it helps, I have little to no sex appeal :P So I'll die alone most likely but I will live without the constant hounding of one woman (then there's my mother who will continue to do so until I bury her six feet under).

If you want an exciting job, just join a PR/Advertising/Mass Communication company. I'm always hearing that lead and exciting yet tiring life with women/men, beer and parties.
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Old 07 Mar 2010, 12:08   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Where the hell is my life going?

You sir have SAD. Get some more sunlight. Or eat more eggs.

[hr]

Dude an art degree tells any employer that deals in creativity that you have creativity and the relevant skills in making something interesting. Be it marketing, media webdesign there are thousands of jobs for small time artists. You don't need to paint the Mona Lisa to get rich.

Secondly go out, meet new people. Someone is going to like you, get over any selfconfidence issues or preconceptions. Just because you haven't had a girlfriend recently doesn't mean jack all. You still have a good 4/5ths of your life to live still, even if you get to 50, think of all the girls who never got boyfriends like you and are growing old...Just saying.

Life is there to be lived, and trying to plan anything past the next couple of weeks is difficult, if not impossible roll with what you got, and dive at each new opportunity.

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Old 07 Mar 2010, 12:17   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Where the hell is my life going?

Come to Leeds for my birthday, I'll get you laid. Promise.
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Well I'd rather not play the game at all than play it like they did! :P
Crikey! This crazy clown causes commotion like the coming of Christ. Contained in a circle corrupted by crackheads and carnal cravings, he creates no concession to callous cheaters concentrating on nought but cock. Certainly, still a curious and cordial cavalier in the countenance of crazed cads, curs and creeps who condemn courtesy as something corny. No cloud could collapse his crushing crescendo of comical crowing and crimson coiffure. This conjecture on culture comes circumlocutive, consequently...

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Old 07 Mar 2010, 12:42   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Where the hell is my life going?

Silk. Get married. I promise you if you get married, suddenly more attractive women will be interested in you than ever have been before. It's been probably the most frustrating development of my life.

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Come to Leeds for my birthday, I'll get you laid. Promise.
I think he wants to get laid by a woman. :P
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Old 07 Mar 2010, 13:16   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Where the hell is my life going?

I meant with a woman >_>
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Restayvien
Well I'd rather not play the game at all than play it like they did! :P
Crikey! This crazy clown causes commotion like the coming of Christ. Contained in a circle corrupted by crackheads and carnal cravings, he creates no concession to callous cheaters concentrating on nought but cock. Certainly, still a curious and cordial cavalier in the countenance of crazed cads, curs and creeps who condemn courtesy as something corny. No cloud could collapse his crushing crescendo of comical crowing and crimson coiffure. This conjecture on culture comes circumlocutive, consequently...

You may call me Circus.
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Old 07 Mar 2010, 13:30   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Where the hell is my life going?

Dude, if Tracy Emming can make it as an artist ANYONE can.
Art is feeling, not talent. If you can convey your feelings in your art then you have every chance of making it. The one thing that will hold you back is you. You have to be driven. If you want something enough you will get it.
Everyone goes through the same shit you know, we all have the "where is my life going" blues. Also, you are still young enough for it not to matter yet. I know LOADS of people who have decided that they want to do something at the age of 30 (or even older) and start fresh into it, yet make it.
Never give up and never lose faith in what you love doing. If there is no joy in what you do in life, you need to find something new. Money isn't everything and in this country there is no reason why people need to be stuck out on their own if they have the get up and go to make something of themselves. One thing I know for sure, no one else will have faith in you if you don't have it in yourself (aside from your family... maybe).
But, I also think Circus' advice is sound as.
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Old 07 Mar 2010, 14:06   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: Where the hell is my life going?

One word: "Walkabout"

Was seriously considering doing it myself, but I think I found my path before doing anything about it...
Though I've heard from thers it's a good way to put things into perspective
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Old 07 Mar 2010, 19:48   #9 (permalink)
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Default Re: Where the hell is my life going?

Join the army. Meet new people, get a differnt direction in life. Make some money. Add a great thing to your resume!
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Old 07 Mar 2010, 19:52   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: Where the hell is my life going?

I came in here with the intention of scream "ellen!" at you, but damn that's deep shit you're thinking there.
Anything I'd have said has already been said.


That was really unnecessary.

-AF
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